It’s hard for me to think of something to write this week. I could talk about how when relationships end you need to focus on the positive and keep putting yourself first. I could talk about how I emotionally ate a lot of peanut butter pie Friday night while talking to my mom on the phone and feel like a bad dietitian because of it. I could talk about being kind to yourself when things aren’t going your way.
But, I don’t feel like it. My mind almost feels blank...and maybe that’s to help me get by. Maybe it’s my body’s way of knowing that thinking too much is not what would be best for me especially right now.
Rather than try to say something profound and inspire others to be or do the same in moments of sadness or distress I’m here to tell you you’re not alone. Social media may make it seem like everyone has it together all the time even after a relationship ends or you don’t get the job you wanted or whatever. But I’d bet people are putting those messages and those pictures out there to make it seem like they’re okay when they’re not. Heck, I did that on Saturday when all I wanted to do was watch Grey’s Anatomy in my bed with the curtains closed. But I wanted to appear stronger than that. Fake it till you make it, am I right?
Despite seeming all happy and strong on social media, I wasn’t. I cried to my mom and dad on the phone before eating all the food in a state of numbness. I stayed in bed for 12 hours, but never actually felt rested or like I slept because my mind wouldn’t shut off. I went to a birthday party at a bar and felt like I was in my own little bubble, incapable of socializing (but I did have fun, Christine!).
This is NORMAL. The people who seem like they have it together likely don’t. But who wants to put that on social media? And so we all get caught in the trap made to make us feel insuperior and weak when in reality this is real life. So let yourself stay in your sweats all day and eat all the food. Wallowing is okay as long as you give yourself an end point. Come tomorrow I’m back at my goals. Working hard at my job, planning my trip to Africa, and getting stronger and eventually dating again. But for now...it’s okay for me to be sad.